The Plan returns. Some of the stuff he says is based on my own experience. Knowing the plan was there and in place allowed me to get through the day, which scares me to this day, because inside I was self-destructing yet because I was self-destructing I was looking to others like I was fine. It’s incredible how depression can turn you into your own killer, planning everything so that you can get away with it. It still sends chills down my spine when I think I wouldn’t even think of hurting a person while plotting my own demise with cold precision.
The part where The Plan talks about saving up sick days is actually true to life. That was part of my own plan. If I could save up time for two weeks, I could do everything I needed to and carry out all the preparations without being missed from work. By the time the vacation was over, it would be too late. Thankfully this plan got derailed, but yeah, these are the things you think of when the plan starts to pull together.
The Plan is fun to draw. I was thinking of the brooms from Fantasia while doing it, and how incredible Walt Disney was at bringing everything to life and infusing it with personality.
But still, this feeling is really scary, but important for me to try to describe. I think.