when you have no energy or motivation to do anything you become numb, but what is keeping you alive … you still have not reached the top of despair … once you realize there is nothing more to gain and nothing more to lose when there is no point in both existence and none existence. then you will realize it’s time to die.
This is also the scary part of getting better or getting on antidepressants – sometimes people regain motivation and energy before they regain the will to live
This is me at the moment. Only thing keeping me into the whole day job thing is the terrifying idea of being homeless again. Everything else is just…not important anymore.
For me this acts as a safety valve. I know that if I become so depressed that I want to die, I will lack the volition to commit suicide. My depression’s most potent weapon against me ironically deprives it of victory. It’s much easier for me to fend it off when I know that the worst it can achieve is a stalemate.
This, as well as being undecided on what method to do it.
There’s been two different times where I had gotten a spike of energy and felt very ready to go through with killing myself. Obviously i didn’t go much further as both only lasted about 1-3 minutes before I was back to no energy. It freaked me out afterward because it was such a foreign feeling feeling so energetic and confident in doing anything.
This is actually a genuine problem with depression recovery, especially that mediated with drugs, and in a careless or clumsy fashion by doctors given poor information and so barely understanding what they’re handing out. For some patients, especially the younger ones who may not have much experience tolerating that state of mind for long periods, the only thing keeping them from taking a final suicidal step is total apathy and fatigue… it’s just too much effort.
Then they get prescribed an unsuitable medication (in this particular case, SSRIs are particular culprits – arguably because one part of their therapeutic effect works *too well*), without receiving any proper advice or oversight whilst starting the therapy, and, oops … suddenly their energy and motivation have got a small but crucial boost, whilst the mood uplift and clearing of the emotional fog is still lagging behind. And it’s goodnight Vienna…
I’ve been here….
nice expression….
This is exactly where I’m at
when you have no energy or motivation to do anything you become numb, but what is keeping you alive … you still have not reached the top of despair … once you realize there is nothing more to gain and nothing more to lose when there is no point in both existence and none existence. then you will realize it’s time to die.
What keeps you alive is the fact that you even lack the motivation to do the final ending.
Even negative motivation is still “motivated”
Being interested in dying is still “being interested”.
Actually caring enough to do the job of it is still “caring” and “being active”.
The top of despair is not suicide, the top is not even having the energy and motivation to do that job.
Literally the only reason I’m still here
Relatable.
This is SO ME.
This is also the scary part of getting better or getting on antidepressants – sometimes people regain motivation and energy before they regain the will to live
Totally relatable. This is me at my worst.
Wow.. this hits hard somewhere deep
Fabulously accurate. Severe depression was the best diet I was ever on.
This is me at the moment. Only thing keeping me into the whole day job thing is the terrifying idea of being homeless again. Everything else is just…not important anymore.
For me this acts as a safety valve. I know that if I become so depressed that I want to die, I will lack the volition to commit suicide. My depression’s most potent weapon against me ironically deprives it of victory. It’s much easier for me to fend it off when I know that the worst it can achieve is a stalemate.
Wow. I get this. Yikes.
Can relate heavily.
Dang, I thought I was imagining this feeling of no-feeling, not even caring enough to die. You’re a genius, sir.
This, as well as being undecided on what method to do it.
There’s been two different times where I had gotten a spike of energy and felt very ready to go through with killing myself. Obviously i didn’t go much further as both only lasted about 1-3 minutes before I was back to no energy. It freaked me out afterward because it was such a foreign feeling feeling so energetic and confident in doing anything.
Accurate. Scarily accurate/
This is actually a genuine problem with depression recovery, especially that mediated with drugs, and in a careless or clumsy fashion by doctors given poor information and so barely understanding what they’re handing out. For some patients, especially the younger ones who may not have much experience tolerating that state of mind for long periods, the only thing keeping them from taking a final suicidal step is total apathy and fatigue… it’s just too much effort.
Then they get prescribed an unsuitable medication (in this particular case, SSRIs are particular culprits – arguably because one part of their therapeutic effect works *too well*), without receiving any proper advice or oversight whilst starting the therapy, and, oops … suddenly their energy and motivation have got a small but crucial boost, whilst the mood uplift and clearing of the emotional fog is still lagging behind. And it’s goodnight Vienna…
Reality….. finally i feel understood. Ive been dealing with clinical depression for 20 yrs. Thank you for this comic ! You got a fan