Even before I got depressed, people told me I was a downer because I would bring up current events etc in conversation or challenge something someone said by pointing out real facts.
There seems to be this culture of ” happy thoughts” and not thinking about real issues. Especially among younger people.
I’m finally getting to know some people who aren’t like this.
But in general, happy culture seems pretty oppressive in as far as it encourages people to gloss over actual problems.
This one’s the worst at work. You literally cannot avoid the “Hey, how are you?”, and because I’m supposed to “leave anything [I’m] struggling with at the door” so as not to be a downer to everyone else, my only option is to plaster on the fake smile (eye-crinkling and all, because I actually researched, studied, and practiced how to fake happiness), no matter how much I want to just be honest for once. People don’t want honesty, they want normality.
I disapprove of lying about feelings in general, so my default answer when I was depressed was “Same as always.” It doesn’t actually tell them how I am, but it’s true and apparently a satisfactory answer. It implies that I’m either always not fine or always fine, and people simply assume the latter. It theoretically allows them to press for details if they’re paying attention and actually want to know how I am, always am, though I’m not sure I remember that ever actually happening.
Feel free to steal “Same as always” if you’re depressed. Just because you can’t answer honestly doesn’t mean you have to lie.
1544C says
The only thing I would care is to use other words for the same response because I’m starting to sound like a robot.
astrogirl says
I hate our culture of “positivity”.
Even before I got depressed, people told me I was a downer because I would bring up current events etc in conversation or challenge something someone said by pointing out real facts.
There seems to be this culture of ” happy thoughts” and not thinking about real issues. Especially among younger people.
I’m finally getting to know some people who aren’t like this.
But in general, happy culture seems pretty oppressive in as far as it encourages people to gloss over actual problems.
tanager says
What ARE you supposed to say when you feel like shit and someone asks you how are you?
Nicholas Dennison says
This one’s the worst at work. You literally cannot avoid the “Hey, how are you?”, and because I’m supposed to “leave anything [I’m] struggling with at the door” so as not to be a downer to everyone else, my only option is to plaster on the fake smile (eye-crinkling and all, because I actually researched, studied, and practiced how to fake happiness), no matter how much I want to just be honest for once. People don’t want honesty, they want normality.
@Enginerd_Dreams says
69 http://t.co/sUFWi7TfbT via @depressioncomix
Scarlet_tears says
Got used to saying “Fine, same as always.” became a habit response..
Damian Greer says
You’re not the only one in that regard. It becomes autonomous for most people, Including me.
Red says
My default has just become “Meh.” Sometimes with a shrug.
It’s vague enough and people don’t quite know how to respond to it, so they drop it and move on.
Alastair M says
“Not too bad”
Emphasis on the “too”
someone says
My default response is just “tired”
Monox D. I-Fly says
My default answer is “Thank God I am still alive”.
medusa says
I disapprove of lying about feelings in general, so my default answer when I was depressed was “Same as always.” It doesn’t actually tell them how I am, but it’s true and apparently a satisfactory answer. It implies that I’m either always not fine or always fine, and people simply assume the latter. It theoretically allows them to press for details if they’re paying attention and actually want to know how I am, always am, though I’m not sure I remember that ever actually happening.
Feel free to steal “Same as always” if you’re depressed. Just because you can’t answer honestly doesn’t mean you have to lie.